Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

If you go to America, you won't see any fat black people. They're all dead and in prison.

Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

Once there was Girl whose Teeth were Crooked. She got Braces.

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

A man is pulled over because he is suspected of drunk driving. The officer comes to the window and is greeted by a man who then replies: What seems to be the officer, problem?

Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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