why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

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A wife asks her husband to treat her like she's special. So he tells her, "Gooooooooooo... Maaaaaaaaaaaaake... Meeeeeeee.... Aaaaaa.... Saaaaaaaandwitch

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Your mother is so fat, that she was instructed by her doctor to go on a low carbohydrate, high protein diet to reduce the risk of heart disease later in life.

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Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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UN

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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So a blonde walks into a wall...

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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