Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

p lkl

why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cause 7 was a petophile and 6 has four children

What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

What is your bill about? Clinton

snooki

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...