KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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"When there's something srange, in your neighborhood... who you gonna call..?" The cops

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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What do you call a window you can see throu? A window.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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Why did the man fall down? Because he was pushed of a 5 story building

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A man walks up to you and asks you:"What's funnier than a dead baby?" and then smiles, you then proceed to frown and tell him he needs to seek help. The next day you see his face on your TV

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

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"What would Jesus do?" "Form a religion, get nailed to a cross, and become a martyr to millions."

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender says"What do u want?" The ducks replays "EVERY DAY IM SHUFFLING!!!" The bartender slaps the duck in its face and quid his job. The bar has a hard time finding a replacement and his business dies. THE END

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops