What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

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A hispanic man eats a taco and enjoys. He is kicked in the nuts 2 months later.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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What do you call a black man in jail Your dad

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she cant use it, she is fat.

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How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

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Invention I totally meant invention! XD, now okay, you can have the top comment, ill even read it because I like ya a lot.

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why did your mom make food to feed the killweeds.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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