What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

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a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

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An Italian leaves the mofia

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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Why did the Japanese man commit suicide? He was terminally ill and decided it was his time to go

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Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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Q: How do you know your gay? A: When you have unexpected desires for men, which is a sin to a religion, so the choice of being gay is against the bible and you would soon be sent to the pit of fire we call hell.

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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Q. Why did the car break dance? A. I dont know!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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