knock knock whos there open open who the door

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

2 drunk men walk out of a bar, they see a dog on the corner licking himself. One drunk says "man, I wish I could do that" The other drunk says "you might want to pet him first"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops