Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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A woman wears a dress.

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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

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Why did Todd have intimacy problems? He was molested as a child.

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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if life gives you melons, then you're most likely dyslexic.

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes

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What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

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A African americia and a Hispanic are in a car, who's driving? The police man

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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