Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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My mother has chlamydia. That's it.

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

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"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

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What do you call a white person? Caucasian

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Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

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why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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Why was the Jimmy Sad? Because he had Autism.

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How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

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Two monkeys are sittin in a bathtub. The first monkey says to The second, "HEY! pass the soap." The second says to the The first monkey, "DUDE. thats not soap, its a typewriter!!!!"

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Knock knock. This is a no soliciting residence, and I do not open my door for strangers.

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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There was a man sinking in quick sand. He looked in the sky and said, "God, if you spare my life, I'll be a great person and believe in you all my life." He died.

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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