I LIKE TRAINS

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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Knock Knock. *silence* Knock Knock.

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What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody fight between a black and a white man.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor and the doctor said "There is no cure for the monkeys in your head"

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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my mind's eye?

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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shut up elliot

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian food that is an American favorite, and the other is a follower of Judaism.

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

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Women. One of the genders a human can be.

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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