What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

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What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family weaped his final days of his life.

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

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What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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What did the Chinese guy say to the black guy? Nothing, the black guy dosen't speak chinese.

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what did the fart say to the butt........bye

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

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Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

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What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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