- Anti Joke

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

Why was the dog hairless? I lied, it was a pig.

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

A black guy walks into a bar orders his drink and could not do it in a more civilized way

What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!