Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? Yeah..neither did she.

What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

why was the asian women such a bad driver? she was blind and had no arms

"Almost as accidental as your spelling I'm afraid." -...

A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower. What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor? An erection. What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender? Hold on. I'll tell you in a second. What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan. -S

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

zx

What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

I like my women like I like my coffee, a brewed beverage prepared from the roasted seeds of an evergreen shrub of the genus Coffea.

You can lead a horse to water, and you can pick your friends, but you can't sneeze with your eyes open.

Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

How does a Black Guy eat chicken. Like anyother human-being.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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