What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

What Happened to the man who married a money? He contracted HIV

"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

No

Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

Brians mother always told him to reach for the stars. He died the next morning.

what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

What does the president and the prime minister of china have in common, Sickle cell anemia. 342

What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

I went to the principle's office because I had a hard time reading They tried to tell me I was lesdistic

What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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