What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

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what is pink and shaped like a banana? A pink banana.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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Why was the bully in detention? He punched a fellow classmate.

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What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. He's not really a chicken, he's just called a chicken because he is always afraid.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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25.

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whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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