Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. What has two legs and is covered in red stuff? A. Half a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

thumb_up thumb_down +8

River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. That always nice, you dont want your dairy products to spoil.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

thumb_up thumb_down +6

82

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops