Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

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When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? Hope.

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Queens Park rangers

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Photons have mass? i didn't even know they were catholic.

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why do black people love watermelon and fried chicken? Honestly who doesn't? Duh! Because most people do! Moral: Not so sure about the coolaid though...

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Hi, my name is Jake.

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You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Women's Rights Movement

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Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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what do you call a black man that sells drugs

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What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

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hey guys im gay

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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