Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

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One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

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Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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a brick cheated on another brick, the brick that was cheated on was angry and became disgusted at the brick that cheated. the current brick that was cheated on tryied top kill the other bitch brick, the brick that cheated tried to break up the fight but testicles

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

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yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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