roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

How do u kill a mocking bird? Stab it

Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

How does the black, high school kid get his new clothes, IPod and nikes? By working at his family-owned convenient store with his father and grandfather every night after school, but not until his homework is done.

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

tommy is retared

Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

arena football

Happy Monday!

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

where did juan go after getting hit by a bus? the ground

I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

Why do I write Anit-jokes. Because I'm very bad at delevering good punchlines. They generally fall flat.

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...