Q.What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.Finding seventeen worms in your apple.

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what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What do you call a donkey on Christmas? a donkey.

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Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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How to have a cheap party in just 5 steps: 1. Buy 100 McDonald's burgers and give everyone food poisoning 2. Bring out that black serial killer's mask you've been working on. 3. Bring out that sharp knife. 4. Slit everyone's throats. 5. Dance.

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

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Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, It is also the material Aodhan's house is made from.

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

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knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops