What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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uh uh uh uh .... oh i swallowed my gum

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Neither has he.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt, its just a myth

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Yo' Mommas so poor, She has to ask close family friends and relatives for money so she can feed you.

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A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

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"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

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Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

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Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln tell a lie? Because he's dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hello??? .....

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What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

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Ever see a man say goodbye to a shoe? Yes, once.

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Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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cancer

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Knock knock Who's there No one. The house has been vacant for years.

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Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops