How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Massie is a fatass

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Roses are Red, Violets are Violet, Not Blue, Kill yourself.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

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What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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What did the guy who dropped his iPhone do? He went out and bought a knew one.

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What do Ping-Pong and Godzilla have in common? Both of them have nothing to do with budhism.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

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What did the black man do when he walked into the bar? He went up the bartender and bought a beer.

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What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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Knock, knock -The door's open.

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What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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