My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

how do you keep a bunch of black kids from jumping on the bed? your real firm with them and tell them someone may hurt themselves if they don't stop with the horseplay..

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

42, that is all

What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

What is the difference between a black man and a potato? Well, there are a great many differences. But the main one is probably that a potato is a potato, and a black man is a black man.

What do you call a black man? A person

Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

Hey, Max!!

How does Moses make his Tea? Hebrews it.

I woke up today

Hey, you know what sucks about being blind? You can see.

Today is March 22.

what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A Coffin.

What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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