why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

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What did the monkey say to the receptionist? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

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(A man in a dark van pulls up)... Hey kids can you come help me find my puppy? The kids get in the car and they find the puppy in a near by park. The kids are then safely returned home.

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What did the man with no teeth say? I need some teeth.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

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What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

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I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

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top kek

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What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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Okay, after this one then...

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What do you call a black man? Black

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Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Once a upon of time, there was a very big kangaroo named Jake. Well one day Jake was eating some food when suddenly a bunch of humans came and saw him. One human name Willie went over to take some pictures of the animal. The Jake ran away.

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if ruddell was gay what would he be? a gay prick

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what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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This is like another one: Terry is at work eating a cookie.. He drops his cookie. His co worker trys to pick it up, however he accidently stands on it. Turns out terry can keep a grudge, nine years later, he killed his co worker with a shovel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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