person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

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Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said: ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

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roses are red violets are blue i have candy im about to rape you

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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Q: "What did the blueberry say to the cheesecake?" A: "I'm not your friend anymore!"

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The Duck walks up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand...Hey bum bum bum....How much is the lemonade

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

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A baby seal walks into a club. It was a tragedy.

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Q: What do you call a black man in space? A: An astronaut. -Ap

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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What do black people and white people have in common? They are both mentioned in this box

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

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What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What's worse than a pile of dead babies? One baby is alive in the middle. What's worse than that? He is eating his way out...

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A horse, an apple, a leprechaun and a black man walk into a bar. They sit down and order drinks. The bartender looks at them and say "what is this, a joke?"

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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