What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

100 chefs walk into a bar

What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

1 black man on the moon = problem 10 black people on the moon = problems Whole black population on the moon = problem solved

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

Boob

Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

so a black guy goes to a hot dog eating contest how many does he eat? enough to win.

A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

Why did a vampire climb Mount Everest in the middle of the night on his birthday in September?

One day, a bear happoned across a man and said "How do you do today good sir?" but the man ran away screaming "OH CRAP, BEARS!!!!" because it just sounded like bear growling (which i would love to dedicate to my friend Chris Bradley, just to make the ball to stick ratio too high)

what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

My daughter is dying of AIDS.

What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

Win industrial estate, Newry

All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

What do you call three mexicans in a bowl of soup? Whatever their respective names might happen to be.

Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...