Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

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people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

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HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

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Rick Santorum 2012

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Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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The Earth is a nice place to live.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "James" "James who?" "What the heck?You forgot me already?Its your bestfriend dude.Now let me in." ~Lil

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I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

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Why are Americans so fat? Poor diet and lack of exercise.

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Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

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Dear Rubix Cube, DONE!! Sincerely, Colorblind

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What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

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How many batteries does it take to run a car 1 a car battery

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A man walks into a bar The bar now has a hole in it.

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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