What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

One day a mans computer was unusually, when all else failed, he had to go to extreme measures. He then refreshed his page.

What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who shit in my garden

Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

A rapist is asked to teach a kindergarden class. The kids learn many things and have a great day.

What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

What do you call a fat person with no friends? An individual who is over the expected weight of a person their age, who finds themselves disliked by people in their s surroundings, possibly due to their weight problem, but also it may be because of any personality defects they may have, or they simply may prefer to be alone.

what is so fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? There is a high possibility their breasts have developed, thus equaling more pleasure for you.

What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

A horse walks into a bar. The Bartender says "Why the long face?" The Bartender is then put into a lunatic asylum for hallucinating and trying to communicate with said hallucinations.

my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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