Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

What's a ghost's favourite country? Fraaaaance.

Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

A Sloth runs...

How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

YouTube Is Red Facebook Is Blue Porn Hub Is Down You'll Have To Do

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

lol

A baby seal walks into a club.

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

Why do black people have the whitest teeth? Because they brush regularly.

I once did something.

Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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