I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

What you reading? reading?

What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

the meaning of life is too burn calories so I burnt a fat kid?

Tom has 24 cupcakes Tom then ate 24 cupcakes what does Tom have? Diabetes Tom got diabetes

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the first monkey? why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure.

Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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