What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

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Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple??? You... Lol jk no there could be alot of things like getting raped, the holocaust, me killing your children i mean someone killing your children. Because if it was me you would know it was me and file a report and i would be arrested and be sent to jail. And in jail i would try my hardest to stay alive brcause if i died that would suck. I would also try not to drop the soap beacuse i might get rapped by some prisib mate, also the floors are quite dirty and that would guve me any type of bacteirial infection like the stupid yeats infection or maby the persob who takes it from me when i finnish would get aids cause it dropped on the floor and who knows were it was. Then he would die from aids and his wife and or kids would be sad and set up a funeral were a preist would stand in akward silence cause the guy murderd the preists father so he wouldnt be mean an ruin the funeral but he wouldnt say anything nice. But after the funeral the preist would go back home and smoke a cigarette because he has started an unhealthy habbit just like millions of people around the world. When will people learn that it kills you faster than cancer well some cancers are quite quick and painless like a head tumor. But most tumors are able to be saved because the doctors are smart these days coming from yale or havord universitys and what not. Most peopel want to take the easy way out by just working at kinkos or wallmart. Both jobs are shit wich is why im probably going to go there cause no one else will except me in there offices or departments. I think its the fact i look like a pedofile trying to kill babys but you know how life is short and difficult to control but you have one life why waste it. Stupid emo kids trying to cut emselfs and shoot themselfs so they dont have to deal with theirs or their partners periods because the other day coming back from mc donalds this guy almost hit me with his car and threw a cup at me for some strange reason but hey not my problem unless he was my first victim?...... Lol jk i have never killed anyone and im not that creapy... Awks POTATO!!!

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What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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rishi is gay (coventry england)

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

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Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!

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What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

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A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

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Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Being a Japanese person in Hiroshima on this date.August 6, 1945

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Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

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Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

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what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

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im jacob, i have as much hair on my penis as mr macs head.....none.

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1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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