An airplane has 100 bricks on-board. If you drop one brick, how many bricks would be left? 99 -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lion King gathered all the animals from the land to a meeting. Everyone came, except one. Who was the animal? The elephant. He's still inside the refrigerator. ------------------------------------------------------------------- You want to cross a river, but you know that there are crocodiles there. There is no bridge, vines to swing from, etc. How do you cross the river? Swim across the river. The crocodiles are at the meeting with The Lion King. ------------------------------------------------------------------- So you swimmed over the river, but how did you still die? You were hit by the brick falling from the airplane.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Roses are red

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Me- hey hitler you lost soemthing. hitler- Vat? Me-world war two.

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There was a little girl who went on a walk. She was about 8 years old. An old green stationwagon pulled up to the little girl. He said,"Need a ride?" She shook her head and climbed in. 2 weeks later she was found dead in a ditch. She was raper and murdered

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69

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How did the boy die in the holocaust? Cancer

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What is the saddest thing in a porno? He doesn't really love her.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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A black and a white man enter the bar all the people jump on the black guy to beat him up when the white guy is geting free vodka

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What do you call a new born baby ? Whatever name you and your partner have agreed upon after months of sifting through baby names.

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

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Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

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Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

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How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

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why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

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what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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