Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

WNBA

Your MUM has aids :D LOL

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

Billy Cundiff.

What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

shammmm is a lesbian.

How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

knock knock who's there no one

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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