How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

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whats one word that gets everyones attention? rapist,bomb,and sex

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

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Why did the burglar get arrested? For beating an egg

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There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. He values his privacy and will not tell me his motives.

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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What's purple and smells like crap? Crap. I lied about the purple

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How did the blind man watch T.V? With the captions on.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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ask me if im a house are you a house? no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops