What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

Feet

whats better than sex? cookies

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

Chuck Norris was a famous actor that starred in Walker, Texas Ranger and Missing in Action. He is a normal person, just like you and me.

Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Cause he was dead.

Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

You cannot invite, hire people for money and expect loyalty Red, you need to make them earn the right to work for you, merits, background checks, consistency, friend, I can help you with a lot of my own experience, what saddens me about you being the leader, is that you have a good heart. And you are naive, a dangerous combination, if anyone such as Jonas shows up again, your life may be in danger, I mean you know who I am talking about.

Q: What does Osama Bin Laden's dead body and a sea sponge have in common? A: Nothing. One was buried in respectful accordance with Islamic law and the other is an animal of the phylum Porifera that's incapable of murdering thousands of innocent persons.

If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

2 scrubbers walk into a room , one says " can you you smell fresh-air spray"?

What's funny about my gay friend? He is a stand-up comedian.

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

Haiku's can be fun But they don't always make sense Refrigerator

What did the blind, deaf, mute child get for Christmas? Leukemia

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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