Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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What's worse than stepping on a nail? stepping on the nail and falling on more nails face first.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

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What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Dyslexia ruels!

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A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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Chuck Norris can carry very heavy objects.

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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