whats the difference between a bench and a mexican? a bench can support its family

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What was the baker a coward? He didn't have the "Bunz" to prove it!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock Who's There 42

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did FiddleBob Joe chuck a stick of butter out the window? Because he wanted to see a butter fly

thumb_up thumb_down -13

im saul and i love cock

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: When do u know when your sister is on her period? A: Your dads dick tastes funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops