How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

Why did Susie start shaking? She had continuous ceasars

noah is a scrub jungle

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

http://suckmytriforce.tumblr.com

What do you call a cow without legs? Disabled.

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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