what do you call a prostitute with AIDS? Most likely her first name, unless of course you know her and it is normal for you to refer to her by a nickname or some shorter version of her proper first name.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

kennah campion... being nice

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He payed for his drinks, tipped the bar tender, drank a few too many so he got a cab home.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

when trouble come down in your neighborhood who you gonna call? the local law enforcement or another form of personal protection

thumb_up thumb_down +12

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats blue, saggy, moldy and smelly? Will Nealis' Vagina

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops