A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

What do you get when you cross chocolate pudding with your mother's slippers? A spanking.

Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

hi penis ham telephone

You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

What is big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? Donald Trump

Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

Why din't Santa come to Timmy's house? Timmy died 6 months ago. :(

Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

Want to hear a joke? No.

I america you read books. But in Soviet Russa, Books read YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple getting blow jobed by a giant squirrel

What's worse than rain on your wedding day? You scheduling your wedding to be held on an aircraft carrier on december 7th 1941.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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