What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

A blonde walks into a bar ouch

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

Whos worse than Akise Teague. Mike Vick

Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

Knock Knock.. Who's there? The IRS, you owe $50,000 in back taxes and we're repossessing your home.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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