A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

a horse nibbled a baby

How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

Roses are red, Violets are red, I'm bleeding, Shit.

Guess what? AIDS!

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

how many neggers does it take to screw in a light bul.... Nvm, Neggers be too busy screwing ur wife, plus they're lazy.

You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Asians.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...