A horse walks in a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?"..... The horse incapable of understanding the humane language promptly poos on the floor and leaves.

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Q:What does a virgin and a penny both have in common? A:Guys don't want them.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he looked behind him and saw a pedophile penis in his ass.

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

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So you all no Dora right, well why is she always lost in the forest wit her friend boots? Whats the deal with the map everybody knows maps cannot talk!!!!!!!!!!!! What the heck is wrong with the makers of the show!!!!!!!!

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hello anomonous

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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People who do not realize the concept of this website, and write real jokes on it.

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A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

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Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

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what did the deaf man say to his long-lost paraplegic brother? He did audibly make noise as deafness from birth meant that the capacity to form words through sound was much reduced, and instead simply gestured a greeting of loving familiarity.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Why did the cat throw up on the couch? because it was nauseous!

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

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What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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