How do I get to Carnegie Hall? The address is 881 Seventh Avenue at 57th street in New York. it's beside the Russian Tea Room and almost directly across from the IESE school of business. The Russian Tea Room has a large bright red awning out front and a large carving of three dancing bears on the face of the building, the bears are covered in gold leaf. You can't miss it.

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One day a man walked into a wall

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

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How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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