Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The Braves win the N.L. east

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Latvia isn't a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -9

fart

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock It's Open!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Yo momma's so fat she ate Sally's arms. Knock Knock Who's There. The police we have a warrant for your mothers arrest on charges of cannibalism and kidnapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the square root of 69? 8.3

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops