Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

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How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

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Obama getting elected in 2012.

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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What did the white guy say to the black guy? I used to be black also. My name is Michael.

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Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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whats up and also down? your mum

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

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Why really answer a question when you can just respond, "because you touch yourself." For example, Q: Why did fluffy die? A: Because you touch yourself.

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

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If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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what happened at the end of the korean marley and me? dinner

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A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

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how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

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What did Hellen Keller say to her baby cousin? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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