Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

When life throws you melons, You probably won't catch them.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

yo momma so fat i abuse my wife

Knock, Knock ..... ..... No one is home, they've been evicted.

Two black guys jump off a cliff, who wins? The black guy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

A man goes into a bar and gets drunk. He realizes that he is too drunk to drive and calls a cab to bring him home.

Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

Obama.

what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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