Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Sosiopath vs How I met your mother: BABABABABA BABABA RARARA LALALA ETC YOU GOT THE DRILL Kids, this is how I met your mother. I saw her at some store, I said "Hey sexy" She told me to fuck off, so I raped her, got out of prison years later, and kids, that is how I met your mother. ...Why I am leaving? Did I ever fucking say I was your father? I Just came here to tell you I raped and killed her after serving my time which was about 2 minutes, so kids, that is how I killed your mother. YOU ARE WELCOME BY THE WAY!Ungrateful kids. Moral of the story: If they are your kids, just say no and get away, and kill Robin for better television. Sociopath vs Grounded for life Moral: Shot the little kid, nobody will notice, not even his own family.Heck if you look at episode 34 you can see a tall handsome dude choking the life of a little boy in the background, and then letting him go just before he passes out and chokes him again? FUN FOR HOURS!

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There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

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Two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffins says "God its hot in here." The other muffin screams "AHHHH talking muffin!!!!"

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A black man in a country bar.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

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Guess how old my lil bro is...Well your wrong cause he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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