you know what hurts.... PAIN

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Timmy. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!!!!

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

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What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.

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Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=148&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=L4yN-90F2S2nXM:&imgrefurl=http://www.britishbeautyblogger.com/2012/05/justin-bieber-nails.html&docid=yYdBShdYVODKdM&imgurl=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YFyj_mKUypY/T6VP6iGQeCI/AAAAAAAAJjI/y6cpVYjn9Gs/s1600/harry.PNG&w=573&h=413&ei=ZY7HT_XqHo2c8QStiY2IDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=724&vpy=140&dur=435&hovh=191&hovw=265&tx=75&ty=135&sig=110416686013590693091&page=12&tbnh=148&tbnw=229&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:148,i:142

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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autistic kids rock

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimers, Hey i just met you.

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Chicken

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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