What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

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Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

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What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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An Englishmen, an Australian, an American and a Chinese man were in a bar they were all friends who were having a drink together.

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What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

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Q: Whats worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

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drake

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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